1. Call a man a lion and he will be very happy. But call him an animal he will be very angry.Is a lion not an animal?

2. What do you call a group of short people coming towards you …Shortcomings

3. If you know more than five stingy people, that means you beg a lot..

4. In Japan a 17yr old is a doctor.In Brazil a 17yr old is a footballer.In India a 17yr old is a shop owner.In China a 17yr old is an engineer.In Iraq a 17yr old is a Soldier.In USA a 17yr old is a celebrity.In Israel a 17 yr old is a priest.In Africa a 60yr old is a whatsapp group admin. God why?

5. My dear 7 days with money makes one week, but 7 days without money makes one weak, wisdom will not kill me.

6. In Nigeria a fat guy from a rich family is called BIGGY while a fat guy from a poor family is called OROBO. That’s where corruption started.πŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™‚πŸ€·πŸΌβ€β™‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

7. Once u marry a bad wife de devil will stop following u because he has settled u already😌😌😌

8. Sometimes you have to keep forgiving him/her while you are still looking for someone to replace her.
This is called constructive elimination by substitution.
Should i increase the volume?

9. First female barber recorded in the Bible was Delilah..
Men Fear Women.

10. Bro u’re dating that girl for more than πŸ’3years, with no intention of marrying her please..Uncle pharaoh let my sister go

11. Who is a risk taker?
A risk taker is someone who has running stomach and still want to mess

12. English teacher will ask me to write a composition about myself and still score me 3/10, is you me? Is me you? Abi are you the two both of us

13. Akpos sat in a bar and was very moody? Soni goes over and asks: Akpos, wetin happen?
A very sad looking Akpos replied: I borrow Rukewe N2million to do facial surgery, and now I no fit recognize am to collect my money back.πŸ˜‡πŸ˜‡πŸ€ πŸ€£πŸ€£πŸ€£

14. An accident occurred today, 11 persons were injured, 12 died. So the Minister of Health promised to offer N5,000 to the injured and N6million to the dead for their funeral.
One of the injured got up and laid where the dead were…
One of the dead shouted, “Bros, go back to your place, do not bring confusion here, they have counted us already!”

15. Some call it rice , Others call it Rice but the correct pronunciation is RICE Argue with ur English teacher.πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

16. Corn flakes is sweet, golden morn is sweeter, akamu is mad oh but at the mention of garri kwaki every spoon must just be bowπŸ‘ŒπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

17. Sometimes I love to be alone, especially when I buy hollandia milk and pepper Turkey.πŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™ˆπŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„

18. A person who is capable of unplugging your charger at 3% to charge his own at 91% can kill you… Be wise πŸ˜’πŸ˜’

19. Breakups are for small girls. Real women will just pause the relationship and resume it when the idiot is back to his senses πŸ˜‚ πŸ˜‚πŸ€”πŸ˜ŒπŸƒπŸΌπŸƒπŸΌπŸ˜ŽπŸ˜ŽπŸ˜ŽπŸ˜Ž